Tomorrow, our baby girl turns one year old!  On January 31st of last year, I was at the clinic working and a heavy snow started to fall.  I went to my OB appointment around noon and according to the doctor, still had a few days to go until my baby arrived.  The due date was Feb   10th. I remember wanting to make it to February, so January could be Cameron’s month.  I came home that afternoon excited about having a baby on the 6th of Feb– the date my OB and I has settled on for induction.  Derrick and I finally committed to the name Carington.  We had picked out the middle name, Hope, almost as soon as we found out she was to be a girl. 

At 4:30 A.m. on Feb 1, my water broke.  This is exactly the time and same way my labor started with Cameron.  There was no denying it was time to go to the hospital.  I think my parents were in shock when I called them.   They drove carefully from Rogers on the snow.  Mom, Derrick and I arrived at the hospital around 6:00.  Carington was born at about 11:30 a.m.   7 lbs 15 oz, 20 3/4 inches long. 

I am sad that she will be one tomorrow.  It is causing me a lot of anxiety.  She is my baby girl.  Just like Cameron was.  Cameron was the first, Carington the last.  How do I know that she will be safe?  She has brought real joy to my life during a time that joy was stripped away from me; a time during which I thought I might not survive.  Carington is my hope. and Cameron is my inspiration.  And Kennedy and Brooklynn have given me a reason to keep going when my will to go on was otherwise missing in action.  My girls– they are all so precious to me.  I want to be the best mom to all of them.  I want them to live and prosper and contribute to this world in a positive way.

Happy Birthday, Carington Hope.  Happy February.  Good-bye to another January.  I keep holding on to the past, but the days keep rolling on.  2008 is here.  Let’s make it a year to make a difference.  It’s another chance to make Cameron proud.